Dealing with someone who is a pain to you?

My wife has a way of looking at my son with her pure heart and telling him, "Don't let one of those girls break your heart." I used to tell my little one the same things too, but life has taught me that heartbreak is God's primary mentoring tool in our lives. Our growth is forged in the fire of interpersonal relationships. I believe relationships are the medium God uses most to procure growth in our lives. God has a way of bringing people into our lives, who seem gifted at making us happiest and angriest all at the same time, whether it be a spouse, acquaintance, boss, or close relation. God tests, refines, and transforms us in the hot pot of relating to "stupid" people. You may say, "Why did you allow this person into my life. I feel akin to the devil for having to relate closely to them." Well, had that person not been allowed in your life, you may have been best friends with the prison guards, for doing something, which may have cost you your personal freedom. As they tried your faith, your treasure chest of patience, experience, and love unashamed was loaded (Rom. 5:3-5). Each new person God brings into our lives is a rainbow of dark and bright; they are God's messengers to mull and shape us into the image of His seamless Son. The Bible speaks clearly to our need to allow love to control in how we are with others (2 Cor. 5:14). We don't have to feel like we can love the seeming (messengers of Satan) God brings our way; we just need love them, dominated by a greater love (James 1:12). At the very least, we can love them for the better person they are making of us. Pray for me as you pray for you that God will help you accept the people gifts He brings your way, leaving you filled with His love to love them on purpose. This one's from deep within me, hope it helped you. People will lie about you to make themselves look better, they'll seem more interested in what you have to give than you; if our focus is on any thing less than their standing as creations of almighty God, hand-picked to grow us in our journey; we'll not allow God's love to control in our interactions with them.

The highway to happiness

We all want to be happy, but few of us live in the reality that happiness or unhappiness is a byproduct of our heart's condition. As we live obedient to God's requirements, we know joy; then, as Charles Finney says, we stumble on happiness regularly in our path. Paul in his second letter to the Corinthians paints a highway you and I must travel if our desire is to know joy that will be the envy of our friends. In 2 Cor. 2:3b he says, Surely you all know that my joy comes from your being joyful (NLT). God designed us to live on His high octane fuel, joy. As we're filled up daily with His fuel, we know no knock (the problem new engines experience when they run on lower octane fuels). So how do we fill up on joy? The passage is clear, we must live for the joy of others. We understand this well from our feelings at Christmas time. Contrary to what we thought, the greatest Christmases we experienced were the ones we spent giving selflessly to others. There's a exclusive joy and happiness which is caught only by a giver. We were made to give not get; getting provides temporal gratification; but giving measureless joy. God help us fulfill our born design, to live like His Son, who lived to give, knowing the joy that would follow His giving, your salvation and mine (Hebrews 12:1).

God, why the pain?

A close look at the words suffering and comfort will provide you with a rainbow of enlightenment. Suffering, Biblically, is a first step in the direction of comfort. God's passion is that we forge strength through the valleys of life, personal strength that becomes encouragement to others. Ever had someone tell you "it's gonna be okay" without the slightest idea of the pain you were experiencing. Their input into your life may have been well-intended sympathy, but it proved to be well short of the empathy you needed. The path you journey is a God-given one, designed to build you and pour useful empathy into you that will prove useful to  others; you'll gain this needful empathy as you keep moving through the valleys of life to its mountaintops. Later, you'll look down toward the verdant valleys you traversed before coming through your troubles; it's then you need to help some soul who needs the God-infused empathy you now live to give. You've been there, worn the t-shirt, you can now truly comfort them with the comfort you've known for enduring suffering. Suffering is the only sure route into pure, unbridled comfort. It high time we embrace our pain as others' gain, as our pain helps us better understand and better others. Here's a catchy story of our need to endure, seeing Christ the invisible One by faith from Tim Elsmore. 
I remember hearing a story about a frog who was hopping along a road when he fell into a large hole. He tried and tried to hop out, but was unable. As his friends came by, the frog beckoned them to go get help. Each of them ran for help, but upon their return they saw the frog hopping along the road again. He was obviously free from the confinement of the hole. When they reminded him that he couldn’t get out, he said: “Oh, you are right. I couldn’t get out. But then I heard a huge truck approaching and I realized…I had to.” Here’s to your best gifts emerging as you face that huge truck coming at you.

What will your life look like after death?

Bell's book "Love Wins" has stolen the attention of many around the world. The reason many are either enamored with His benign, ever-pardoning God or disturbed by His disregard for the eternal prison, the home of the devil and those who aren't God's friends, is because the supernatural tends to control in much of what we think. I think if we're not careful, we'll allow our thoughts of life after death to enamor us and not change us from the inside out. Life is a matter of preparation for eternity as we all will stand and give report to Christ for how prepared we are meet Him (Heb. 9:27; 2 Cor. 5:10). So the question is what will your life look like after death? Scripture is clear regarding the things we can do to ensure confidence and not shame when we die. The first is to allow our bad blood (bent to do wrong) to open our eyes to our need to begin a transforming, personal relationship with Christ. He died so that we'd hold onto His death alone for safe passage into an eternity of rest, reward, and rule with Christ; His resurrection was the Father's receipt proving that trust in His Son's selfless death alone gives us the gift of heaven. Second, having begun a relationship with Christ, we must live as the people salvation has made us, ones showing our faith by our works (James 2). If we'd allow these thoughts to control in how we live; we'll be prayerfully and confidently readying ourselves and others for life beyond death's door, too busy to be aimlessly debating whether eternal pardon is available here only or in the hereafter also, knowing the right time to prepare for life after death is now (2 Cor. 6:2).

God is love not shove

I grew up under the impression that the primary gene of God is His holiness. On studying Scripture and our place in God's program as the church; I'm not convinced. Yes, the angels in Isaiah 6 proclaim God a thrice holy God, yes, John shuttered at the brass feet of Christ, God of glory; but how do you want your children to remember you? As a distant dictator, one unapproachable, who always had it together or as one, who nurtured them well with empathy and compassionate care. The Bible is very clear in 1 John 1 that God is light, undimmed by darkness; but its portrait of God in 1 John 4 is love, not distance or shove. He desires to be near, not distant, for "He's not far from anyone of us," Acts 17. He is not cold and uninterested but near, mighty to save. Peter portrays Him as the Christ, who keeps us way beyond salvation with His delivering Hand. John 13 is crystal clear regarding how others are to know God, by our love for one another just as Christ showed us God by His demonstrating His love on Calvary's cross. He shared with us the Father's love dying for us enemies, without strength, and cursed by sin. Christ in a word is love. Your past need not keep you from His Hand of mercy; in Christ, you can be made new or restored today, for God is love.

A humble view of ourselves helps us better bless others

One of our failings as people is to overestimate our importance to the success of others. The funny thing is while we're focusing on how integral we are to their success; we tend to neglect their real, immediate needs. My inspiration for writing this blog is my current pastor, Dan. I love the way he downplays his importance to my success; meanwhile doing everything he can to ensure I'm all God made me to be. God desires that we have a Biblical view of self. We may think we're beasts (in the Black-American sense) but we still have to sleep (Tripp Lee). Yes, we are just mud, dust stuck together; but as mud we have help roles to fill in the lives of others that we fill best. Reach into the lives of those in and out of your circle today. You'll touch them when you see yourself as a hand, a foot of Jesus to them; meet their needs selflessly, sacrificially, out of joy not duty. Be intentional about seeing yourself the way God sees you and touching others God's way.

Are all your friendships superficial or do you have close friends?

The love of Jesus is nothing short of boundless. When Christ condescended from heaven's portals to walk our mile; He came with one purpose, to show us the bond between Him and the Father so that we'd see our desperation apart from a personal relationship with God. Christ and the Father were one in their close union. How about you? Do you have a close friend? One you can bear your feelings to without fear of embarrassment, judgment, or betrayal. We drove our closest friends to LAX today. As we dropped them off we felt as if we lost them, though they're gone for just two weeks. I believe the reason we feel as we do is because they listen open-mindedly, there is nothing we can tell them which demeans their view and love of us, they share generously, there is nothing within reason you should withhold from those you love; but they hold to us closely, to be near those you love is to reveal who you really are and see parts of others that don't always rub you the right way. But, to be near the beauty and rust of others gives us a vision of how we want to be accepted and loved, simply for who we are. Genuine friendship provides an avenue to be yourself but Biblical friendship refines you as we are lovingly led to rid the rust in our lives, which makes us difficult to be around.

Are you self-righteous or Christ-like in your relations with fellow Christians?

2 John reminds us of our individual responsibility to walk in the doctrine of Christ. However, in our quest to be doctrinaire, we may find ourselves becoming less and less like the Christ we desire to model before others. I've personally struggled with finding myself becoming self-righteous in my dealings with fellow believers, particularly those who didn't agree completely with my belief system. G.K. Chesterton speaks of our tendency to live in either a small or broader circle. If we're not careful we'll call ourselves people of "the way" when in reality we are small minded and inclined only toward people of our doctrinal persuasion. Though we must maintain sound doctrine, the expression of our stand for our beliefs is as or more important than our Jesus belief's themselves. God help us as Christians to relate to fellow believers in a way that becomes their place as fellow believers in Christ. As we take these words to heart, we'll leave the motives of others in God's hands; we'll be people slow to speak, quick to listen, a people prone to pray and embrace those different from us as God guides us, we'll deal with fellow Christians in a accepting way. The only people Christ reserved anger for were the Pharisees; God guard us from a show of righteousness, a vain show which knows nothing of true, heart religion.

Change your viewpoint on trials

The words of Laura Story's song "Blessings" have encouraged me so much. I'm sure they'll help you as well. Feel free to view it on the video bar of our blog; be encouraged.

Laura Story - "Blessings" Lyrics

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home,

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

Suring up where we're weak

I had great food for thought this week from Darrin Patrick's book "Church Planter," regarding my responsibility to grow in my areas of weakness as a pastor. Yes, I've been taught to staff weaknesses as a future leader, but the proverbial monkey which I delegate remains my own. Some pastors are strong theologians, others are strong in the areas of missions or shepherding. I must know where I excel and not lead with my strengths alone but have the humility to grow in my areas of weakness; life requires growth and the joy growth brings is well worth it.

How are you?

Many live with a facade of well-being, when their lives are falling apart. Many are forced to feign success and personal prosperity, when in their hearts they're searching for answers. Many fail to know the benefit of taking an honest assessment of their lot in life and making a turnabout, which could be transforming in their experience and in the lives of others. I'm Dave; I'm so excited to network with you, to share experiences. God is impassioned with your knowing joy and fulfillment in your experience. I'm looking to learn from you and to help you with my experiences.